Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Frustrated

In this hour of midnight, I should be gone sleeping either everyone for the sake of good health for body. I was indeed sleeping just now but i just cant, all the heavy thought in my mind. I'm sad and mad about my sis, why cant she change and face the fact. Every time she came home with her personal problem, relationship problem, money problem, medical problem, all sort of problem that you hardly bear with. All the problem, troubles is not as simply as you thought it should be. Its involved hospital, clinic, boyfriends came in the middle of night for not trusting what she said, all kind of ridiculous occurrence. And sometimes its happened so sudden that seems so doubted, out right nonsenses, crazy. Seems like all the problem of hers often occurred has become part of our life that we had get used to it. But sometimes you just get so annoyed with all those problem and how badly you wishes and hopes to have a peace for ONCE for the god sake when she came home. I still love her nomatter who she was, she always be my sister, the one and the only sister. Somehow how badly i hope she realized what she was doing, and awake from it to prevent the same mistakes keep repeating. Everyone learn from their mistakes and grew from the experience  to build better future, theres nobody love you more than you love yourself. 
Maybe i'm just depressed recently for the coming revision class, preparation for exam, tight work schedule, and the people around me being dishonest when they lied infront of your freaking face. Just be true to yourself, there's no different  between you and me if you look at everyone as a human, we are all the same. Maybe there are reason behind the lies. Sigh, just accept the fact of truth underneath the lies.
I should take a deep breath and head to sleep. =O 
goodnight.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Someone

It's been awhile since the last post. Maybe due to exam, workload, and class. Or maybe i just lost my motive to blog anymore due to certain of occurrence that makes such a huge impact in my life. But i do believe that no matter how busy your life would be there is always time, it just depend how you utilize your time. Talking about time management, i cant denied that i have a bad time management. even thought i knew the amount of workload needed to be done in a day. I would still spend some hour on online-ing, chatting nonsense with friends, surfin unnecessary things, or just to wait for somebody to online, atleast it brightened me a moment. Right? I am a human, i do need entertainment. But doing so, there are price to pay which i had to sacrifice my sleeping time so that i'll be able to complete my work

Somehow, today i've been told by my boss that since after my teaching, my english has improve to be fluence. It was a compliment to me but indeed, its kinda fishy because they seldom praise about they employees. O,O When good things come to you, bad things will come as well. That i am so freaking incautions step on something. I bet you might think of  SHIT!! YEA RIGHT... Am not, instead i stepped on the amulets accidentally. Its not like i directly step on it. Sigh.. I felt damn sorry and unforgiving myself that until i have bend down my knees infront of god to ask for forgiveness. Sigh... How could i stepped on the thing i always wear close to me, and somehow happened twice at yesterday and today. ARGH!! =(
Maybe im having "shui" gas surrounded me. Please stay away from me as far as you could.

When you expressed your feeling indirectly to someone but someone was not into you like how you did to someone, its kinda look stupid on yourself. Yea, i mean myself. i swear i would never do that again. =S 
I think the best thing that i just stay single for good. But when i have hard time, i do need someone be there for me. Friends would not be there for you always, because they have life to busy with, you just cant kept bothering them. Maybe i can just try to increase my workload, more work less thinking about stupid hopeless untruth unreal thoughts. Been staying single for 2year, it wasn't that bad. I prefer my student alot, they are so naive, pure, innocent, truth to themselves and i don't have to be fake infront of them =)


time for bed. Bed time story, ANYONE? LMAO
goodnight